Skip to main content

In Praise of Melancholy

 

Though happiness is the ideal that we all love to chase, the fact remains that sorrow is the solid underpinning of human reality. There is no life without a touch of grief. The possibility of failure lurks at every bend along the road. There is no mountain, however alluring it is, without its due share of boulders and ravines that impede your progress upward.


Certain truths are painful but also inevitable. You can’t avoid them. You can’t escape them. For example, the truth that most people won’t understand you when you desperately need to be understood. There are times when you wish that at least your spouse understood you better. Your best friend will ditch you when you most need help. Have you ever noticed that loneliness is a universal phenomenon? You can feel lonely in the middle of a party. The realisation that the other people are grappling with their own shame and sorrow must have hit you like an enlightenment more than once. These are just a few examples. There are other sorrows, innumerable ones.

That is how life is. Sorrow is the unheard melody that holds up the entire orchestra of life. You can’t avoid sorrow unless you choose to live in some private sheltered little world. Like a ship that never moves out of the harbour.

The ship has to move out. It has to face the storms and waves.

With sobriety. With sober melancholy.

Contemporary philosopher, Alain de Botton, describes this melancholy as a “noble species of sadness that arises when we are properly open to the idea that suffering and disappointment are at the heart of human experience.”

Suffering and disappointment are at the heart of human experience. There’s no escape from them. A sober realisation of that fundamental truth gifts you melancholy. It gives your smile a strangely seductive charm.

PS. This post is a part of Blogchatter Half Marathon.

Comments

  1. The phase of life that I am going through right now, it's like posts are giving me all my answers. This one is gold!
    Mayuri/Sirimiri

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for this super compliment. You will definitely tide over the present phase. And then smile...

      Delete
  2. Sorrow & melancholy are important too in my humble opinion. These help come to terms with loss and are part of the healing process. Never been more true than in the present times.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Suffering and disappointment are at the heart of human experience. There’s no escape from them. A sober realization of that fundamental truth gifts you melancholy. You said it. No denial at all. And what about that everlasting throbbing in the heart which is the result of suffering (and a sense of helplessness) only?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Despair is capitulation. Disappointments shouldn't lead to despair but to certain realisations.

      Delete
  4. I do not know how to put across but I have been going through this phase for quite some time now. a setback teaches one a lot and probably because of this I can understand this post well !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I have endured much in my life. Now in the autumn, life seems to be mellowing. It should, na? 😊

      Delete
  5. Hari OM
    Such truth in this - I have often said that without the sense of suffocation, how would we know we were breathing? It certainly peppers life. I, however, am one of those annoying personalities that despite many lows can absolutely learn to float - or climb - away. The memories are there, but they harm me much less. Suffering unquestionably exists - we are left to find out how we deal with it. YAM xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's great that you have such an "annoying" personality :)
      I too went through a lot of hells and came out alive if not kicking.

      Delete
  6. Loved the way the topic is put up. Such lucidity and clarity on such a complex topic. Guess we all go through the above mentioned phase and doubt our worth and sanity, posts like these reaffirm are beliefs and faith.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, we all go through tough times and each one responds differently... Ultimately the winner is the one who learns the lessons soberly.

      Delete
  7. Can't agree more...Pain and suffering is at the core....one should fight and come out of it....Thank you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Struggle and win, yes, there's no other option really.

      Delete
  8. It's a strange concept to understand that sorrow and happiness could/must coexist. They're like the two sides of a coin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Undoubtedly. And sorrows must lead one to a kind of philosophical melancholy.

      Delete
  9. An interesting post.Perhaps when you find contentment within yourself, happiness and sorrow may not have that much of an impact on one's life.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Can anyone reach such contentment that happiness and sorrow will have no impact? I'm not sure.

      Delete
  10. Such an insightful post! And true. If we enjoy happiness, we must learn to deal with sadness. However, we all have different ways of dealing with sorrow.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, we have our own unique ways of dealing with sorrows.

      Delete
  11. There is no life without some amount of suffering. I dont understand it, but its a fact. I guess thats why religion is so popular - to help us get over our downs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, religion can help one to deal effectively with suffering.

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Adventures of Toto as a comic strip

  'The Adventures of Toto' is an amusing story by Ruskin Bond. It is prescribed as a lesson in CBSE's English course for class 9. Maggie asked her students to do a project on some of the lessons and Femi George's work is what I would like to present here. Femi converted the story into a beautiful comic strip. Her work will speak for itself and let me present it below.  Femi George Student of Carmel Public School, Vazhakulam, Kerala Similar post: The Little Girl

The Little Girl

The Little Girl is a short story by Katherine Mansfield given in the class 9 English course of NCERT. Maggie gave an assignment to her students based on the story and one of her students, Athena Baby Sabu, presented a brilliant job. She converted the story into a delightful comic strip. Mansfield tells the story of Kezia who is the eponymous little girl. Kezia is scared of her father who wields a lot of control on the entire family. She is punished severely for an unwitting mistake which makes her even more scared of her father. Her grandmother is fond of her and is her emotional succour. The grandmother is away from home one day with Kezia's mother who is hospitalised. Kezia gets her usual nightmare and is terrified. There is no one at home to console her except her father from whom she does not expect any consolation. But the father rises to the occasion and lets the little girl sleep beside him that night. She rests her head on her father's chest and can feel his heart...

The Vegetarian

Book Review Title: The Vegetarian Author: Han Kang Translator: Deborah Smith [from Korean] Publisher: Granta, London, 2018 Pages: 183 Insanity can provide infinite opportunities to a novelist. The protagonist of Nobel laureate Han Kang’s Booker-winner novel, The Vegetarian , thinks of herself as a tree. One can argue with ample logic and conviction that trees are far better than humans. “Trees are like brothers and sisters,” Yeong-hye, the protagonist, says. She identifies herself with the trees and turns vegetarian one day. Worse, she gives up all food eventually. Of course, she ends up in a mental hospital. The Vegetarian tells Yeong-hye’s tragic story on the surface. Below that surface, it raises too many questions that leave us pondering deeply. What does it mean to be human? Must humanity always entail violence? Is madness a form of truth, a more profound truth than sanity’s wisdom? In the disturbing world of this novel, trees represent peace, stillness, and nonviol...

The RSS does not exist

An organisation that has 80,000 branches in India does not exist legally in any document. This is the cover story of The Caravan this month. By the way, The Caravan is one of the very few publications that still continues to exist in spite of being overtly critical of Narendra Modi and his Sangh Parivar. The Rashtriya Swayamsevak Sangh (RSS) is not registered as an organisation under any of the usual Indian registration laws such as the Societies Registration Act or as a trust or company. It functions as an unregistered voluntary organisation, though it is arguably the largest public organisation in the country. This situation makes the organisation absolutely unaccountable to anyone, argues The Caravan . The RSS is not legally required to file annual returns to the Tax department or disclose its financial details publicly though it deals with thousands of crores of rupees every year especially after Modi became the Prime Minister of the country. The membership of the organisat...

No Problems Only Opportunities

You’ve probably heard this joke. A young man walked into his office one morning and found a beautiful young lady sitting in his chair. He called the MD and said, “Sir, I have a problem.” The MD replied, “Don’t you know our company’s motto, young man? No Problems, Only Opportunities .” When Suchita of The Blogchatter sent me a mail with the topic of this week’s blog hop –  - the first thing that came to my mind was the above joke. I know many people – too many, in fact – who went through terrible problems. My own life was a series of problems in none of which was there the consolation of any beautiful woman. One essential lesson I learnt from life is that life is a series of problems. You solve one and then arises the next one. Now I have reached an age when problems are no more problems: they are life itself. If you ask me what was the biggest problem I ever dealt with, it was my last years in Shillong. I was a lecturer in a college drawing a fat salary stipulated by the U...