Tomichan Matheikal's blog

  Human beings have infinite ways of deluding themselves. ‘Just-world bias’ is just one of them. It is the belief that we live in a just world which rewards us for our good deeds and punishes for the evil ones. In other words, we believe that there is a moral order in the world or the universe by which our actions merit just consequences. You get what you deserve. What you reap is what you sowed. What goes around comes around. Karma. Most religions believe in the just-world concept in one form or another. In religions, a god or some divine entity controls this system. Many people who are not religious believe in a universal force that maintains this moral balance. The naked truth is that there is no such force or divine entity dishing out justice to us from somewhere out there. The death of an innocent child due to a pandemic alone should be enough to make us realise that the heavens are not a bit as fair as we would wish them to be. We can choose to hoodwink ourselves with beliefs

  Lewis Terman is a psychologist who put a high premium on intelligence. “There is nothing about an individual as important as his IQ, except possibly his morals,” he declared fervidly. He carried out a lifelong research on certain highly gifted children continuously until they grew up into adulthood. His research is the longest-lasting longitudinal study ever conducted. In 1921, Terman sent a team of fieldworkers to California’s elementary and high schools with the mission of finding out the brightest students. Intelligence tests were conducted on the students suggested by the teachers. The top ten percent of the candidates were given another IQ test. Those who scored above 130 in that second test were administered a third test. Thus Terman selected the most intelligent students of California, no less than 1470 of them. These students, who came to be known as Termites, were monitored constantly as they grew up. They were tested at regular intervals, the results were analysed, and

  One of the best philosophies of life is humanism. It is an attitude to the world that is centred on human experiences, thoughts and hopes. Our rational faculty is the foundation of this philosophy. Our reason can tell us clearly why certain actions are good and others are bad. Our reason can tell us why we should choose the good and avoid the bad and hence can be the solid foundation of our morality. Our moral code does not require other trappings like gods and religions. Humanism asserts that we have the right and responsibility to give meaning and shape to our lives. This noble philosophy aims to build a more humane society through an ethic based on human and natural values in the spirit of reason and free enquiry. The American Humanist Association defines humanism as “a progressive philosophy of life that, without theism or other supernatural beliefs, affirms our ability and responsibility to lead ethical lives of personal fulfilment that aspire to the greater good.” It is i

  “Good children do their homework on time; their writing is neat; they keep their bedroom tidy; they are often a little shy; they want to help their parents; they use their brakes while cycling down a hill.” [ The School of Life: An Emotional Education by Alain de Botton et al] The world wants good children. Moulding good children is apparently the only purpose of the very existence of parents and schools. This is one of the gravest injustices done to children. The excessive need for compliance shown by the good child, the eagerness to please others, and the unquenchable thirst for appreciation are signs of a subdued existence. The good child is a bud that won’t bloom. It is a nestling that won’t fly, at least not far enough. The good child is a bland breeze that carries no tang. The good child chooses such compliance maybe out of love for a depressed parent who makes it clear that she couldn’t cope with more problems. The good child may be trying to soothe a violent parent.

  Is your life driven by your past or more by your future? Psychologist Alfred Adler argued that our goals and ideals (which lie in the future) motivate our actions much more than our childhood and other past experiences. Some of our goals and ideals may be far-fetched. Yet these future possibilities guide us more strongly than all our past experiences.   Life is never an easy process. It is a protracted pain with occasional bouts of joys and excitements. We accept all the pain as natural and inevitable. It is like a long train journey in India. The dust and filth in the train as well as outside, the noises and delays and tasteless food and umpteen other unpleasant things are accepted as normal part of the journey. But the tender coconut that comes when the Warangal sun is boiling your innards is a memorable delight. The sight of the rear end of the train as a bend in the rails is being negotiated may animate the child in you. We have a natural affinity with joyful experiences thou

  The greatest blessing one can have in old age is a sense of fulfilment. And that won’t appear out of the blue when you retire from your job. Life is never easy for anyone though many people are lucky to be born in circumstances that support healthy growth and development while quite many others have to endure much agony to get stray ecstasies. A lot of things that happen to us – right from our parents – are beyond our control or choice. We are born not because we want to be. A lot of people come in and go out of our lives irrespective of our likes and dislikes and not without leaving deep imprints in our psyche. Teachers, for example. Religious people like priests who may shape or distort our entire perspectives irreversibly. As we grow up, we will definitely come across a lot of unsavoury people and situations. They all affect our personalities. Yet in the end, what we are is our own responsibility in spite of all the knocks and kicks we receive all along. Finding fulfilment in

  “Whom did you lose first, yourself or me?” Draupadi asked Yudhishthira when the latter lost her as a stake in a gamble. Yudhishthira had lost himself first, in fact. He was not his own master when he staked his (as well as his four brothers’) wife. Even if he had not lost that game and even if he was the sole husband of that woman, was he her owner who could stake her like a material possession? Is the wife a property of the husband? Is a ruler the owner of what he rules over? Most rulers behave as if they are the owners and masters of their territories and people. That is one of the most common delusions of those who wield power over others. All of us nurture some delusions even if we don’t have any power over other people. Perhaps human life is impossible without some delusions. Duryodhana, the man who started the game that eventually led to an epic war, was actually envious of his cousins, the Pandavas. “An enemy, however tiny, whose might grows on is like an anthill that ev