Conversations with God

Inside a church in Kottayam

The novel which I’m reading currently is the English translation of the Malayalam Valli by Sheela Tomy. It received rave reviews in standard publications and that is the reason why I decided to read it. Having read about a hundred pages, I must say that it’s a charming work. It’s musical. It’s a symphony. But I’ll write a proper review after I read the whole of it. Right now, I wish to speak about the conversations that a character named Varky has with his God, Jesus, whom he calls Karthav (Malayalam for Lord). Varky is a drunkard. When he is drunk, he becomes more chatty with his Karthav. In one of his final chats with Karthav, before the deluge carries him away, Varky says, “Look at Him just sitting there! After turning water into wine to vex people for evermore! It was your Divine Majesty, wasn’t it, that made our Kalyani here (the woman who supplies him with locally brewed liquor) spicy and poor Magdalena Mariam pretty? And then you go around keeping tabs. Yes, Varky will own up, I have been falling down drunk a couple of times. Maybe more…Don’t be pissed off with poor Varky. My sin, my sin, my most grievous sin…”

I have found myself talking to Jesus in similar ways quite often. I am not a believer in the usual sense of the word. But Jesus remains as a very friendly and spiritual energy somewhere deep down in my consciousness. I indulge in quite many conversations with him – sometimes friendly and sometimes not so friendly. They are the only prayers I ever utter. No religious person may accept my chats with Jesus as prayers. For me they are prayers just because they soothe my soul like nothing else can.

If I were born in a Hindu family, it would have been Krishna instead of Jesus that got all my spiritual attention. I like Krishna’s romantic side, you see. But if it were Islam, I wonder who would have listened to my chats. Allah wouldn’t be quite chuffed with sentences like ‘Don’t be pissed off…’ I have no problem at all, however, with anyone praying to any god. My problem is when people get pissed off with other people’s gods and prayers and rituals.