Tomichan Matheikal's blog

Is it possible for anyone to shed the ‘baggage’ of the past and turn a clean, new leaf in life? A few years back, some eminent psychologists studied this and came to the conclusion that our ability to envision the future is strongly influenced by our memory of the past. In other words, we tend to use memories of past experiences to predict what our life will be like in the future. Daniel Kahneman, a psychologist who won the Nobel Prize for his contribution to the field of behavioural economics, uses an example to illustrate how our memories shape our thoughts and feelings. A person had dinner at a restaurant. Everything went well. The food was delicious, the wine wonderful. Memorable dinner. You would recommend the restaurant to anyone. Just then something goes wrong. The waiter spills some coffee on your elegant suit. Odds are that the coffee spill will taint your memory of the food and the wine. What lingers on is memory rather than experience, argues the psychologist. Fu

Crises are an integral part of human life.  Doubts, anxiety and even despair seize us mercilessly sometimes.   They can be excellent opportunities for personal growth, provided we deal with them effectively. Personal growth calls for some change.  It may be a change of attitudes, environment, job or something else.  Most of us don’t like change.  Change frightens us with the uncertainty that inevitably accompanies it.  Psychotherapist Sheldon B. Kopp wrote 4 decades ago (in his book, ‘ If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him! ’) that the neurotic who comes to a therapist doesn’t want to change himself.  “His goal is to become a more effective neurotic.”  He doesn’t want to give up his neurotic feelings and attitudes because he is scared of the changes that would ensue.  He would rather have his neuroticism and have the therapist make him feel more comfortable with it.  Change is  challenge to face the unknown.  The misery of the familiar is preferred to the myste

"What does the future hold for us?" she asked. "Look up," I said.