Skip to main content

The Sensitive Indian Patriot


Samuel Johnson was wrong.  Far from being scoundrels, we, the Indian patriots, are an exceptionally sensitive lot.  “As sensitive as the toilet seat,” I can hear the antinational prigs snicker.  The fact is that we care for Mother India.  We care for the Gau Mata.  That’s why we don’t tolerate the likes of Ramya, former MP and actress, who dare to say that “Pakistan is not hell.”  Tell me, how can a former Member of Parliament, make such a statement when she ought to know that the cause of all our problems is Pakistan?  Earlier that other actor’s wife said she felt insecure to live in India.  We told her to go to Pakistan along with her Muslim husband.  And now we have slapped a sedition charge on Ramya.  We are patriots, not scoundrels.  Our national sensitivity is offended when anyone says that Pakistan is not hell.  Our national pride is founded on the premise that Pakistan is our hell.

For light to shine, there has to be darkness.  Pakistan is our darkness.  India is heaven because Pakistan is hell.

All the antinationals in Hindustan must understand that the very reason for our existence as a nation is to hate Pakistan.  So anyone who refuses to denounce Pakistan is anti-India.  Even Sir Donald Trump endorses that policy.  Jai Hind.


Labels:

Comments

  1. CifarAugust 24, 2016 at 11:40 AM

    PM stopover in hell, he give gifts to leader of hell, WHY? Is he getting tips how to make India hell as well.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 24, 2016 at 2:37 PM

      Has Mr Modi ever done anything that does not contradict what he did or said earlier?

      Delete
  2. UppalAugust 24, 2016 at 11:49 AM

    Patriotic people are sensitive.Sweeping generalizations don't mend matters.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 24, 2016 at 2:37 PM

      Mahatma Gandhi was sensitive, you mean to say, Uppal?

      Delete
  3. Pranju chakrapaniAugust 24, 2016 at 1:00 PM

    I had the opportunity of meeting some pakistani fellows in my workplace and it is a pity how I am antinational for liking them.

    state sponsored terrorism is not sponsored by the entire demography but we must hate the lot for being national.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 24, 2016 at 2:41 PM

      This is the real tragedy spawned by nationalism. It makes us hate. Has nationalism ever made anyone love anyone?

      Delete
  4. RakeshAugust 24, 2016 at 1:13 PM

    Biting sarcasm! Loved it! It's true, if you see. Pakistan is our panacea. We may have our own poverty, potholes and foeticide, but there's nothing that cursing Pakistan won't cure. Great observation! :D

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 24, 2016 at 2:43 PM

      I'm glad you came here after a long time. I'm sure this is not going to be the only good thing happening after my opening the FB account once again :)

      Delete
  5. जितेन्द्र माथुरAugust 25, 2016 at 10:50 AM

    Good satire sir. I have grasped the essence of your post. Pseudo-nationalism has become the order of the day in India for the past some time.

    Jitendra Mathur

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 25, 2016 at 5:51 PM

      People who don't have any qualities of character pretend to be nationalists today. The PM himself said that 4 out of 5 of them are criminals.

      Delete
  6. Dr Vikrant GoenkaAugust 25, 2016 at 12:47 PM

    Nice one sir...I really liked ur views..... But if u go watch movies like 'sarabjit' & others that show the past of the two countries....u will get to know why there is so much hatred for Pak!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 25, 2016 at 5:53 PM

      Do I need to watch these pop movies in order to know the history of my country, Vikrant? I have a good collection of history books at home, written by eminent historians. I read pretty much, you know. :)

      By the way, one of the good things happening after I opened the FB account is that you are here.

      Delete
  7. sunaina sharmaAugust 25, 2016 at 7:53 PM

    I am smiling and imagining patriots are buying their nails reading your post. Agree with Rakesh. Also you have another subject for post - movies and their 'coloring' of history. You are on FB now ????? GOOD!!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 25, 2016 at 8:49 PM

      Patriotism of the kind I'm witnessing in my country now has become a pain in the unmentionable part, Sunaina :) There's no better way to deal with it than satire.

      FB is a slippery slope. I'm becoming bold enough, I think. After all, falls are my birthrights.

      Delete
  8. Rajeev MoothedathAugust 25, 2016 at 8:00 PM

    Some valid points in your post....

    ReplyDelete
  9. RandomIndianAugust 27, 2016 at 10:03 PM

    Ha, I sense the sarcasm.. Let the so called "nationalists" read this...Good post, BTW.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 28, 2016 at 6:28 PM

      Thank you. All the nationalists can scratch and feel their nationalism once again :)

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Florentino’s Many Loves

Florentino Ariza has had 622 serious relationships (combo pack with sex) apart from numerous fleeting liaisons before he is able to embrace the only woman whom he loved with all his heart and soul. And that embrace happens “after a long and troubled love affair” that lasted 51 years, 9 months, and 4 days. Florentino is in his late 70s when he is able to behold, and hold as well, the very body of his beloved Fermina, who is just a few years younger than him. She now stands before him with her wrinkled shoulders, sagged breasts, and flabby skin that is as pale and cold as a frog’s. It is the culmination of a long, very long, wait as far as Florentino is concerned, the end of his passionate quest for his holy grail. “I’ve remained a virgin for you,” he says. All those 622 and more women whose details filled the 25 diaries that he kept writing with meticulous devotion have now vanished into thin air. They mean nothing now that he has reached where he longed to reach all his life. The
62 comments
Read more

The Adventures of Toto as a comic strip

  'The Adventures of Toto' is an amusing story by Ruskin Bond. It is prescribed as a lesson in CBSE's English course for class 9. Maggie asked her students to do a project on some of the lessons and Femi George's work is what I would like to present here. Femi converted the story into a beautiful comic strip. Her work will speak for itself and let me present it below.  Femi George Student of Carmel Public School, Vazhakulam, Kerala Similar post: The Little Girl
44 comments
Read more

Unromantic Men

Romance is a tenderness of the heart. That is disappearing even from the movies. Tenderness of heart is not a virtue anymore; it is a weakness. Who is an ideal man in today’s world? Shakespeare’s Romeo and Sarat Chandra Chattopadhyay’s Devdas would be considered as fools in today’s world in which the wealthiest individuals appear on elite lists, ‘strong’ leaders are hailed as nationalist heroes, and success is equated with anything other than traditional virtues. The protagonist of Colleen McCullough’s 1977 novel, The Thorn Birds [which sold more than 33 million copies], is torn between his idealism and his natural weaknesses as a human being. Ralph de Bricassart is a young Catholic priest who is sent on a kind of punishment-appointment to a remote rural area of Australia where the Cleary family arrives from New Zealand in 1921 to take care of the enormous estate of Mary Carson who is Paddy Cleary’s own sister. Meggy Cleary is the only daughter of Paddy and Fiona who have eight so
39 comments
Read more

Octlantis

I was reading an essay on octopuses when friend John walked in. When he is bored of his usual activities – babysitting and gardening – he would come over. Politics was the favourite concern of our conversations. We discussed politics so earnestly that any observer might think that we were running the world through the politicians quite like the gods running it through their devotees. “Octopuses are quite queer creatures,” I said. The essay I was reading had got all my attention. Moreover, I was getting bored of politics which is irredeemable anyway. “They have too many brains and a lot of hearts.” “That’s queer indeed,” John agreed. “Each arm has a mind of its own. Two-thirds of an octopus’s neurons are found in their arms. The arms can taste, touch, feel and act on their own without any input from the brain.” “They are quite like our politicians,” John observed. Everything is linked to politics in John’s mind. I was impressed with his analogy, however. “Perhaps, you’re r
34 comments
Read more

Country without a national language

India has no national language because the country has too many languages. Apart from the officially recognised 22 languages are the hundreds of regional languages and dialects. It would be preposterous to imagine one particular language as the national language in such a situation. That is why the visionary leaders of Independent India decided upon a three-language policy for most purposes: Hindi, English, and the local language. The other day two pranksters from the Hindi belt landed in Bengaluru airport wearing T-shirts declaring Hindi as the national language. They posted a picture on X and it evoked angry responses from a lot of Indians who don’t speak Hindi.  The worthiness of Hindi to be India’s national language was debated umpteen times and there is nothing new to add to all that verbiage. Yet it seems a reminder is in good place now for the likes of the above puerile young men. Language is a power-tool . One of the first things done by colonisers and conquerors is to
14 comments
Read more