Inspiration for beginners

 

Book Review

Title: Inner Feelings

Author: Cindy D’Silva

Format: PDF E-book

Dag Hammarskjold’s Markings is the best diary I have ever read. I don’t think he wrote it with the intention of publishing. It is a collection of the author’s personal inner struggles. The entries started when the author was 20 years old and ended at his death by a plane crash at the age of 56. The entries reveal the deep psychological and spiritual struggles that the author passed through and the lessons he learnt from them. You will find such gems as “Never measure the height of a mountain, until you have reached the top. Then you will see how low it was.” And “Like the bee, we distil poison from honey for our self-defence…”

I was reminded of this classical diary while reading Cindy D’Silva’s short e-book whose entire title is Understand and Accept Your Inner Feelings to embrace life wholeheartedly. This is not to suggest that this book reaches Hammarskjold’s profundity. But there is the striving. There is a strong desire to overcome the hurdles on the way and conquer heights. Moreover, the book reads like a personal diary written in order to come to terms with the author’s own inner struggles.

Look, for example, at this observation on guilt: “No, I’m not perfect. As a parent and spouse who takes care of numerous tasks, including the 2-minute jobs in between them, I have sometimes: 1. Burnt utensils to charcoal; 2. Slept through a messy house…” It’s a pretty long list which concludes with the counsel: “You see, no one is SUPERHUMAN. We just organize our priorities differently…”

Occasionally there is poetic irony in the writing. “I wanted to be an actor or a model but did not grow more than 5 feet.” At times there is pain. “Some people probably thought it was a joke but sadly their words stuck with me and gave me such low confidence that I could barely introduce myself without a pounding heart.” The confessional vein juts out sometimes. “When I wanted to lose the fat which I felt wobbling every time I danced, I tried hitting the gym and got bored in two weeks. I preferred sitting and hogging in front of the idiot box instead.”

The book presents 27 themes for the reader’s contemplation. The themes vary from ‘appreciation’ to ‘passion’, ‘hope’ to ‘vanity’, and ‘gaslighting’ to ‘gossiping’. The blurb ‘warns’ the reader not to read the pages in a hurry. “Take your time and read it,” it counsels, “feel it and absorb it.”

The book, in other words, is not for casual reading. It is not even meant for enhancing one’s knowledge about the themes. It is meant to inspire, to make one meditate, to help one introspect and improve oneself.

Having said that, I must add that I was left finally with the impression that the author could have made it a little less preachy and more suggestive. Of course, the style and tone of a book depend largely on the targeted readership. This book seems to be meant for novices in self-exploration.

The book can be downloaded here.

PS. The above book is part of the Blogchatter Ebook carnival and my own modest contribution to it is LIFE: 24 Essays, absolutely free to download.