Skip to main content

Living in the Present


“Yesterday’s gone ... and tomorrow may never be mine,” says a Christian hymn.  Only today, this moment, is mine to act in.  But is it really possible to live in the present moment much as that is the best thing to do.  It is best to live without the hangovers of yesterday and also without the mirages of tomorrow.  Is it really possible, however?

One plain truth is that we are a product of our past to a very large extent.  Whatever we may do, it is impossible to erase all of our past.  The past has shaped our attitudes, thinking and our very character so much so it steps in whenever we are trying to find solutions to the current problem.  It is impossible to ignore the past.  The past is an integral part of our very being.

Religion never lets the past go
Not even in the life next!
I spent my youth with certain people who rendered unenviable assistance in making a mess of my life.  They were apparently trying to help me shape my character which, according to them, was pretty bad.  They were religious people and I was an atheistic hedonist.  They thought that I had sold my soul to the devil and they took it upon themselves to redeem my soul.  My life became such a misery to me that I ran away from the place and took up a job in another place where the people who surrounded me were of a totally different religion and didn’t give two hoots for my irreligion.  I rediscovered myself in that place without much difficulty. 

Happiness is short-lived.  That’s one of the plain truths of life.  I was fortunate to have at least a decade and a half of happiness unintruded by religious people.  But then they came.  In the form of a religious cult.  They were not interested in anybody’s soul.  They were only bothered about throwing people out of the place and grab the property to themselves. 

The old missionaries returned to my life using the opportunity.  Missionaries always know how to strike when you are the most vulnerable.  This second assault left me thoroughly beaten.  It was unwarranted and unexpected.  I couldn’t even continue blogging (my favourite hobby and pastime).  It took me about six months to overcome the depression. 

This second assault left a far deeper scar in my being.  

However much I try to live in the present, I am unable to do it.  My repeated experiences make me wary of everybody much as I long to trust at least one person. 

Mine may be a unique experience.  But I’m sure there are many people who have gone through other experiences which have reshaped their very being in undesirable ways.  I’m sure the number of such people is not at all insignificant.  That’s why I decided to write this.  Just to tell them that it is not a sin if they can’t live in the present even though that is the ideal.  Ideals belong to a privileged few: those who can shape their destiny in spite of external forces that impinge on us constantly.  Most people are not so privileged.  And hence most people have an yesterday whose ghosts haunt them, and a tomorrow that is already darkened by shadows.

“I’m only human, I’m just a man / Help me believe in what I could be and all that I am...” That’s the opening lines of the hymn with which I started this post.  But who is going to offer that help?  God?  The hymn believes that.  But I don’t. I am still an atheistic hedonist.  I believe in the present.  The religious people don’t.  They believe in the life hereafter.  That’s the endless conflict between them and me.


 PS. This is written for Indispire Edition 146 #CelebrateTodayThisMoment

Comments

  1. Rajeev MoothedathDecember 3, 2016 at 10:53 AM

    A very well written post that has experience as its strong base!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Abhijit RayDecember 4, 2016 at 10:25 AM

    Past is History, Future is Mystery, we only have present.

    ReplyDelete
  3. sunaina sharmaDecember 4, 2016 at 6:34 PM

    I find it difficult too....to live for the time being.....to live in the present moment....Our minds can never be free from past hurts and future anxieties.

    ReplyDelete
  4. UnknownDecember 8, 2016 at 2:06 AM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Country where humour died

Humour died a thousand deaths in India after May 2014. The reason – let me put it as someone put it on X.  The stand-up comedian Kunal Kamra called a politician some names like ‘traitor’ which made his audience laugh because they misunderstood it as a joke. Kunal Kamra has to explain the joke now in a court of justice. I hope his judge won’t be caught with crores of rupees of black money in his store room . India itself is the biggest joke now. Our courts of justice are huge jokes. Our universities are. Our temples, our textbooks, even our markets. Let alone our Parliament. I’m studying the Ramayana these days in detail because I’ve joined an A-to-Z blog challenge and my theme is Ramayana, as I wrote already in an earlier post . In order to understand the culture behind Ramayana, I even took the trouble to brush up my little knowledge of Sanskrit by attending a brief course. For proof, here’s part of a lesson in my handwriting.  The last day taught me some subhashit...
10 comments
Read more

Lucifer and some reflections

Let me start with a disclaimer: this is not a review of the Malayalam movie, Lucifer . These are some thoughts that came to my mind as I watched the movie today. However, just to give an idea about the movie: it’s a good entertainer with an engaging plot, Bollywood style settings, superman type violence in which the hero decimates the villains with pomp and show, and a spicy dance that is neatly tucked into the terribly orgasmic climax of the plot. The theme is highly relevant and that is what engaged me more. The role of certain mafia gangs in political governance is a theme that deserves to be examined in a good movie. In the movie, the mafia-politician nexus is busted and, like in our great myths, virtue triumphs over vice. Such a triumph is an artistic requirement. Real life, however, follows the principle of entropy: chaos flourishes with vengeance. Lucifer is the real winner in real life. The title of the movie as well as a final dialogue from the eponymous hero sugg...
4 comments
Read more

Abdullah’s Religion

O Abdulla Renowned Malayalam movie actor Mohanlal recently offered special prayers for Mammootty, another equally renowned actor of Kerala. The ritual was performed at Sabarimala temple, one of the supreme Hindu pilgrimage centres in Kerala. No one in Kerala found anything wrong in Mohanlal, a Hindu, praying for Mammootty, a Muslim, to a Hindu deity. Malayalis were concerned about Mammootty’s wellbeing and were relieved to know that the actor wasn’t suffering from anything as serious as it appeared. Except O Abdulla. Who is this Abdulla? I had never heard of him until he created an unsavoury controversy about a Hindu praying for a Muslim. This man’s Facebook profile describes him as: “Former Professor Islahiaya, Media Critic, Ex-Interpreter of Indian Ambassador, Founder Member MADHYAMAM.” He has 108K followers on FB. As I was reading Malayalam weekly this morning, I came to know that this Abdulla is a former member of Jamaat-e-Islami Hind Kerala , a fundamentalist organisation. ...
10 comments
Read more

Violence and Leaders

The latest issue of India Today magazine studies what it calls India’s Gross Domestic Behaviour (GDB). India is all poised to be an economic superpower. But what about its civic sense? Very poor, that’s what the study has found. Can GDP numbers and infrastructure projects alone determine a country’s development? Obviously, no. Will India be a really ‘developed’ country by 2030 although it may be $7-trillion economy by then? Again, no is the answer. India’s civic behaviour leaves a lot, lot to be desired. Ironically, the brand ambassador state of the country, Uttar Pradesh, is the worst on most parameters: civic behaviour, public safety, gender attitudes, and discrimination of various types. And UP is governed by a monk!  India Today Is there any correlation between the behaviour of a people and the values and principles displayed by their leaders? This is the question that arose in my mind as I read the India Today story. I put the question to ChatGPT. “Yes,” pat came the ...
10 comments
Read more

The Ramayana Chronicles: 26 Stories, Endless Wisdom

I’m participating in the A2Z challenge of Blogchatter this year too. I have been regular with this every April for the last few years. It’s been sheer fun for me as well as a tremendous learning experience. I wrote mostly on books and literature in the past. This year, I wish to dwell on India’s great epic Ramayana for various reasons the prominent of which is the new palatial residence in Ayodhya that our Prime Minister has benignly constructed for a supposedly homeless god. “Our Ram Lalla will no longer reside in a tent,” intoned Modi with his characteristic histrionics. This new residence for Lord Rama has become the largest pilgrimage centre in India, drawing about 100,000 devotees every day. Not even the Taj Mahal, a world wonder, gets so many footfalls. Ayodhya is not what it ever was. Earlier it was a humble temple town that belonged to all. Several temples belonging to different castes made all devotees feel at home. There was a sense of belonging, and a sense of simplici...
34 comments
Read more