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Identity Crisis


I suffer from identity crisis quite frequently these days. Every year in November, I face the most acute crisis because I have to prove to my government that I am alive. Otherwise the princely monthly sum of Rs 1812 (about 21USD) that I get from my most magnanimous government [“Modi’s guarantee,” as Modiji himself shouts from the rooftop these days] as pension for having been a teacher for four decades will be terminated. ‘Life Certificate,’ the government calls it. It states that I am not dead yet as on the date when I go to any of those government machineries and give my thumb impression to prove that I am not dead so that I will get my pension. We don’t expect governments to be sensitive, of course. In fact, toilet seats are more sensitive than any government. [Prove me wrong, if you are part of any government. My personal conviction is that government is the biggest looter in any country.]

Oh, ah, that sounds seditious. In my country, it can even mean my arrest. I live in the country that claims to be the Viswa guru [world’s teacher]. It is perhaps the only country in the world today that is a democracy without any opposition because all opposition is either suspended or imprisoned. The world should indeed learn how that sort of a system works. We have a prime minister who is very popular though he suspends or imprisons all opposition. How does he manage to do that? Well, that’s what I am learning still. [When I learn that I will write a book that will outdo Machiavelli’s Prince and Chanakya’s Arthashastra.]

In the meanwhile, every now and then I get messages from different offices that my KYC [Know Your Client] is not completed. So I click on the link provided in each message and give my Aadhar number. Those who are not familiar with India’s Aadhar need to recall the biblical verse of Mathew 16:26: ‘What good will it be for you to gain the whole world, yet lose your Aadhar number? What can anyone give in exchange?’ Well, I have paraphrased the verse a little. You are as good as dead in India if you are an Indian without Aadhar. That’s one of our PM’s guarantees.

What made me write this post, you may wonder. One of my banks sent me a message the other day asking me to furnish my KYC details. Nothing of those details has changed from the time I transferred my account from a Delhi branch to a Kerala branch in 2015. But India has changed a lot in that duration. So I click on the link given by the bank in the email message. It sends me from one webpage to another, each imposing on me the burden of an OTP and the copy of some document like PAN or EPIC or Passport or oh God! Aadhar is already there with them. And that Aadhar is linked with everything I own from cooking gas connection to my antivirus injection. How many proofs do they need for my existence, I wonder. What are they really trying to prove? My identity? My redundancy? Will my government ask me one day to provide an image of the brick I donated for the construction of the Ayodhya Temple?

[That reminds me: I have to address about 2000 school students tomorrow. And the theme will be: Redundancy of people in the emerging world. So let me stop this and start thinking of the speech.]

Comments

  1. Is there anyway I can hear your speech?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Anu, for the compliment, as immense as it is sweet.
      It's only a short assembly speech on AI and its challenge to human relevance.

      Delete
  2. That wasn't someone phishing, was it? Whenever some random email appears asking for important data about me, I get very suspicious.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No, it wasn't. I have learned certain strategies to deal with fake messages. Nowadays Indian banks are doing this online.

      We have a lot of things going on here, with the government itself doing the foulest things like spying on citizens using Pegasus and such technology!

      Delete
  3. Hari OM
    I admit, I had same thought as Liz A... our banks and institutions can never ask that we re-identify online. It must be done in person; safer for them and us. That aside, Big Brother is surely singing karaoke... YAM xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I answered Liz above and I'm sure there's no need to add anything to that. Big Bro is more than singing karaoke these days. He's snorkeling.

      Delete
  4. Can't think about democracy withering away ...which have already started by the way.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you think India will have any meaningful democracy after the next Parliament election?

      Delete
  5. I am well aware of this November identity crisis, since I follow the protocol for my father and mother-in-law. I have funny doubts about it, especially with my geriatric parents. But I'll share them on another day.
    Thank you for visiting the blog, sir. So kind of you. I was mia most of 2023 due to personal problems that unfortunately I carry into 2024. I hope I can get back to regular blogging and the community soon.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can understand, Sonia. No problem, though you are missed sometimes. Glad you dropped in in spite of the hectic sschedule.

      Delete
  6. Good luck!
    And Happy New Year.

    It's beyond me how some leaders and some former (hope it stays that way) leaders seem to get away with anything and everything. :-/

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are too many criminals in politics. We could even be deluded into thinking that politics is meant only for criminals. That's why...
      .

      Delete
  7. I fully endorse your cause; the entire Modi government is causing harm to India, yet there is a lack of voices speaking out against it. Or I wonder do they come out alive if they did, Anyway I wanted to address that, this verification thing is kinda needed coz you would like to check out this news article.."https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.bbc.com/news/world-asia-pacific-10809128.amp " Deception transcends the confines of both body and soul

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Read that story from Japan. Of course, all sorts of deception are common and there should be some checks. But how many?

      Delete
  8. I worry about the number of emails you're getting about KYC. As for our PM. He has elevated himself to a place, i dare not point 🤐

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. After you've crossed 60, institutions become wary of you, it seems. They want all kinds of proofs, even about your very existence!

      Delete

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