Nightmares abound in my sleeps. They are
all very similar too like the sheep in a flock. Their fidelity to one theme used
to disturb me. Not any more, because I have accepted them as my lifelong
companions. Moreover, their frequency has declined considerably.
mysterious but friendly person persuades me to go on a journey and takes me
along strange yet familiar landscapes. Rugged mountains with turbulent rivers.
Initially the place looks familiar, like Shillong where I lived the most
painful years of my life. Eventually, however, the place assumes fiendish
shades and undertones. There are people and they don’t seem to notice me. Yet
they look menacing indirectly as if they are lying in ambush just waiting for
an opportunity to pounce on me. The person who brought me here has vanished. I
walk alone with inimical forces all around. There is no harm done to me but the
threat is always looming all around. Sometimes I am caught in a labyrinth on
the mountain. Sometimes it’s a labyrinthine mansion which always reminds me of
some Catholic seminaries. Do the menacing figures in my nightmares wear white
cassocks? That question arises in my consciousness after each nightmare.
I have longed
for sweet dreams. They evade me. Mercifully, my reality is better than my
me most is the element of betrayal in my nightmares. The bizarre terrains and
the detached hatred on faces don’t terrify me as much as the betrayal by the
person who initiates my journeys into the alien landscapes.
much betrayal in my life, especially in Shillong. In fact, Shillong sucked out
my trust in people with all those betrayals. I have lived a relatively solitary
life ever since leaving that hill town. But the town continues to haunt my
me that there is something called ‘hidden memory.’ That is the place where we
send our stressful, traumatic or fear-related memories. This is a kind of self-protection
mechanism. But these memories don’t peter out eventually. I guess, they keep
coming back in our nightmares.
I have made friends with my nightmares, so to say. I know how they are going to be. I accept them with humility and resignation. Sometimes I even feel that I should be grateful for all the trekking I get in my dreams.
Written for Indispire Edition 430: Do your dreams/nightmares
have a common theme? Write about the theme or lack of it.