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Friend, Unfriend




My FaceBook account is accessible only to my friends.  At least, that’s how I intended it and fixed the settings.  The reason is that I want only those people who know me to read what I write in that social media which is not as civilised a place as the blogosphere.  Moreover, I make a lot of political statements there and many people may not like such statements, especially those who are known as bhakts these days. 

The other day I made a comment on a link posted in FB by a blogger friend.  I used to avoid her ever since I discovered that she and I were poles apart in our attitudes to the current politics in the country.  But something provoked me to make a comment.  She reacted saying that she does not appreciate such comments and I should not use her space for writing such things.  I unfriended her immediately.  When there arise conditions and restrictions on what you can express, it is no more friendship.  I don’t make rude or vulgar comments anyway.  

But the next day the grand lady sent me a fairly long apology via messenger and sent me a friend request.  I told her the apology was out of place.  If we are poles apart in our attitudes and views, we should keep apart from each other.  But I accepted the friendship particularly because she said that we should accept divergent opinions.  Within moments of my accepting her friendship offer, she unfriended me. 

I laughed like a mad man when I saw what she did.  What was she trying to prove?  That it was her prerogative to befriend or unfriend, not mine?  

There is a kind of fraudulence in the attitude of such people.  They are not what they pretend to be.  They preach big morals in their writings and pretend to be profound philosophers.  I am blunt when it comes to calling a spade a spade.  But only when it is a spade.  I don’t pretend. 

The people whom I keep as far away from me as possible are pretenders.  I don’t mind if I have only a handful of friends.  It is better to have a few genuine people around than a thousand frauds.

Inspired by Indispire Edition 184: #Friend2Stranger


Comments

  1. Purba chakrabortyAugust 31, 2017 at 8:24 PM

    This is such weird behavior. To request you to accept the friend request and then unfriend. I just abhor such pretenders.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 31, 2017 at 8:56 PM

      Honestly I don't know why she did it. I had !much respect for her in spite of our political differences. Now I hold her in utter contempt.

      Delete
  2. Jyotirmoy SarkarSeptember 1, 2017 at 7:43 AM

    Probably this is what called "ego problem".
    When you are writing specially on politics then you should have the mindset to accept different opinions but reacting like this is ridiculous...did her like her attitude.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalSeptember 1, 2017 at 11:39 AM

      We can disagree with others in mature and acceptable ways. In fact, I have an FB friend who is a staunch BJP loyalist and who questions me. But we get along well respecting each other's views in spite of our differences.

      Delete
  3. Pranju chakrapaniSeptember 1, 2017 at 12:00 PM

    I have not been able to follow your posts of late. I hate myself for getting tangled in a new place with new people. Perhaps curiosity had a better of me. Few friends, you talked about. I don't know how to even have those few friends. How would I know for sure whether they are worthy of my friendship? So I thought of making some interactions with them. No. They disappointed me.

    They want to have the last word, last act, last blow. So, is it better to keep on searching for genuine friends when the pretentious ones try every chance to throw the final blow irrespective of opinions and views?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalSeptember 1, 2017 at 12:32 PM

      People have become so opinionated that it's impossible to get 'genuine' friends. I guess we have to manage with what's available. But this lady's behaviour went beyond all my expectations and experiences.

      Delete
  4. Anita SabatSeptember 1, 2017 at 12:54 PM

    Quantity of friends doesn't matter, quality does.

    Strangely I have faced a similar 'follow & then unfollow' situation on Twitter!
    An 'influencer' & Blogger got into an ugly public conversation with me on Twitter. Then she begged for forgiveness & followed me on Twitter & after I had done the same, unfollowed me!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalSeptember 1, 2017 at 3:13 PM

      Some people are so egoistic that they can beg like that Ram Rahim fellow and then try terrorist strategies to save their bums!

      Delete
  5. Maya VardeSeptember 5, 2017 at 8:12 PM

    That was a very childish behaviour of the lady ! Or she wanted to have the last laugh ? But in any case you are fortunate that you are no longer 'friends'...👍

    ReplyDelete
  6. Tina SequeiraSeptember 6, 2017 at 1:29 PM

    This is good occurence. You don´t need such false friends in your circle anyway. True friends will accept you the way you are...differences in opinions and even lifestyles...they are non-judgemental. Unfortunately, the world is full of such two faced people.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalSeptember 6, 2017 at 7:52 PM

      I had not expected this from this particular lady, however. That makes it all the worse. But such people are more in number these days.

      Delete

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