Skip to main content

Sarayu’s Sorrow

 Fiction

He sat down on the bank of the Sarayu with a heavy heart.  The palace of Ayodhya stood silhouetted against the setting sun.  He could hear a cry rising beyond the scarlet horizon like the subdued rumble of a reluctant thunder.

He wanted her, to be with him till the end of his life, to be his life’s ultimate meaning.  But she had refused to undergo yet another fire test. 

“How many fire tests will be required before my husband can trust my fidelity?”  There was fire in her eyes as she asked that question.  But it was a subdued fire.  Like the fire inside a volcano.

“It’s not I who suspect your fidelity,” he explained.  “You know the people of Ayodhya.  They think any woman who has spent even a single night in the abode of another man is sullied.  And you know how many nights you spent in the abode of a rakshas.”

He was torn between conflicting desires.  He wanted her, body and soul.  His subjects loved him, no doubt.  Some of them even adored him.  Such love is impersonal, however.  There is nothing like the love of one’s beloved.   Had Ravana indeed not touched her?  Can a rakshas be so good at heart?  Are the people making unnecessary allegations and demands?  Hadn’t she already proved her innocence by jumping into the fire that Lakshmana had ignited at her insistence? 

People don’t like to see others living in love, he thought.  They like strife and violence.  The excitements of love are too frail for the rank and file.  They want war when they are bored with the mundane affairs.

And I?  What do I want?  He asked himself.  Whose love do I value more?  My beloved’s love that is as pure as the snow in the Himalayas or the love of my people that melts away when the sun shines?

He found it difficult to make a choice.

Commitment makes certain inhuman demands, he thought.  You have to give up something if you want to gain something.  Which shall I give up?  Do I dare?

The sky grew darker than usual.  The clouds came rolling like black rakshasas.  They began to rumble.  Like a tiger that was waking up from its slumber.  Lightning flashed.  One after the other.  They set the sky on fire.  They roared.  The roar was far from being subdued.  It terrified him.  It terrified the earth.  And the earth split into two.  He felt the tremor beneath his feet.

The night passed giving him nightmares.

Valmiki visited him the next morning.  Bhumi has received his daughter back, he said.  Your sons are with me.  They should be growing up in the palace.  What sin have they committed?  Or do you wish to bestow on them your guilt?

From his palace he could see the Sarayu flowing.  Her waters were sullied because of the previous night’s rain. 


What can I bestow on anyone?  He asked himself.  Except guilt, maybe.  


PS.  Inspired by Ram Navami.  Wish you all the joys and blessings of the festival.


Top post on IndiBlogger.in, the community of Indian Bloggers


Comments

  1. wow you have a way with words Mr.Matheikal! I actually started sympathizing with Mr.Ram !

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As I passed the Chattarpur Temple (Delhi) this morning, all decked for Ram Navami but with countless police people all around, this story began to generate in my imagination. Glad you liked it.

      Delete
  2. You've seen the story from a different perspective..a much human one ..rather than his God-like stature . In Bengali literature we have an ancient poet named Krittibas Ojha who translated Ramayana is Bengali verse. He portrayed the character of Ramchandra in this way....like a normal human being..vulnerable and full of emotions...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That vulnerable and emotional Rama must have been the real Rama, don't you think? People create gods. That's my view.

      Delete
  3. Yes, I fully agree with you on this point..human beings create Gods and a God's credibility always depends on his devotees.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sir ...... i am speechless.... you have seriously potryed rama's real image and amazing one.....even ater beinng relegious hindu... i always wanted to analyse that why he left his loving wife... u made it easier for me.. thanks

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Most welcome, Manish. Religion becomes more meaningful when we understand it deeper. Of course, rituals and mysteries may have their relevance for some. But for me, the rational-emotional approach works.

      Delete
  5. The story in Ramayana says that it wasn't the real Sita who was kidnapped by the demon king. See, how the stories and perspectives vary. Ram is known as 'Maryada purushottam', one who acts with the utmost decorum. So, he did what a king had to do and along with it he didn't allow Ravana to even touch Sita (a husband's duty). This is how I look at the story. I prefer the godly figure of Shree Ram. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. There are many versions of Ramayana. There is a Buddhist version in which Sita is Rama's sister.

      The concept of "Maryada purushottam" has to be reexamined. During the days of Ram, it was a man's (as opposed to woman's) world. The man made all the rules and those rules determined the meaning of maryada. Are those rules and notions applicable now?

      Secondly, the moment you attribute perfection to gods you place them above and beyond you. Such gods are only fit for worship and miracles. The real gods should be within ourselves, with all their (our) imperfections and vulnerabilities. Only then they become meaningful to us, helping us in our search for meaning.

      Delete
  6. A nice and human account. I agree with views expressed by Maniparna...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I too accept Maniparna's view. It's a very rational approach.

      Delete
  7. Wonderfully written !

    ReplyDelete
  8. Wonderful human perspective and a non-judgemental that leaves the reader thoughtful

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Literature is never judgmental. Glad you found my account non-judgmental and thought-provoking.

      Delete
  9. Beautifully written. The noted Novelist Narendra Kohli has written Ram Katha in a series of his novels depicting Ram as a human creature.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ram, Krishna, Jesus, Muhammed... weren't they all human beings first? Thank you for the compliments.

      Delete
  10. Replies
    1. Thank you. Hope to be good enough in future too :)

      Delete
  11. Amazing...in a way this is the best version from Ramayana :)

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Prelude to AtoZ

  From Garden of 5 Senses, Delhi [file pic] Hindsight gives an unearthly charm and order to the past. There can be pain too. A lot of things could have been different, much better, if only we possessed the wisdom of our old age back in those days. As a writer put it, Oedipus, Hamlet, Lear and a lot of those guys must have thought, “I wish I had known this some time ago.” Life is a series of errors with intermittent achievements. The only usefulness of the errors may be the lessons they teach us. Probably, that is their purpose too. We are created to err so that we learn, I dare to put it that way. I turn 64 in a month’s time. It’s not inappropriate to look back at some of the people whom life brought into my life so that I would learn certain lessons. No, I don’t mean to say that life has any such purpose or design or anything. Life is absurd. People come into your life as haphazardly as vehicles ply on your road or birds poop on your head. Some of these people change the chemist

Why I won’t vote

From Deshabhimani , Malayalam weekly Exactly a month from today is the Parliamentary election in my state of Kerala. This time, I’m not going to vote. Bernard Shaw defined democracy , with his characteristic cynicism, as “ a device that ensures we shall be governed no better than we deserve .” We elect our government in a democracy. And the government invariably sucks our blood – whichever the party is. The BJP and the Congress are like Tweedledum and Tweedledee though the former makes all sorts of other claims day in and day out. BJP = Congress + the holy cow. The holy cow has turned out to be quite a vampire and that makes a difference, no doubt. In our Prime Minister’s algebra, it is: (a+b) 2 which should be equal to a 2 and b 2 . There is an extra 2ab which is the holy cow. In George Orwell’s Animal Farm , the animals revolt against the human master and set up their own nationalist republic. Soon politics develops in the republic and some pigs become leaders. The porcine

How Arvind Kejriwal can save himself

Narendra Modi and Amit Shah have a clear vision. Eliminate all opposition. Decimate them or absorb them. My previous post [link below] showed a few people decimated by them. Today let’s look at the others: those who are saved by joining the Bharatiya Janata Party [BJP]. 1. Himanta Biswa Sarma  This guy was in Congress and faced serious charges related to the multi-crore Saradha chit fund scam. He also faced corruption charges related to drinking water supply in Guwahati. His house was raided by the Central Bureau of Investigation [CBI]. Then he switched over to BJP and all his crimes just vanished. It’s as simple as taking a dip in the Ganga and all your sins are forgiven. Today he is the chief minister of Assam. Nothing is heard of all the charges that were levelled against him. 2. Amarinder Singh  This former Captain in the Indian Army was a Congressman until Modi’s Enforcement Directorate [ED] started raiding him, his son and his son-in-law. He put an end to all those raid

The Good Old World

Book Review Title: Dukhi Dadiba and irony of fate Author: Dadi Edulji Taraporewala Translators: Aban Mukherji and Tulsi Vatsal Publisher: Ratna Books, Delhi, 2023 Pages: 314 If you want to return to the good old days of the late 19 th century, this is an ideal novel for you. This was published originally in Gujarati in 1913. It appeared as a serial before that from 1898 onwards in a periodical. The conflict between good and evil is the dominant motif though there is romance, betrayal, disappointment, regret, and pretty much of traditional morality. Reading this novel is quite like watching an old Bollywood movie, 1960s style. Ardeshir Bahadurshah, a wealthy Parsi aristocrat in Surat, dies having obligated his son Jehangir to find out his long-lost brother Rustom. Rustom was Bahadurshah’s son in his first marriage. The mother died when the boy was too small and the nurse who looked after the child vanished with it one day. Ratanmai, Bahadurshah’s present wife, takes her

Kejriwal’s Arrest in Modi’s Kurukshetra

For some mysterious reason, Arvind Kejriwal’s arrest reminded me of Haren Pandya. Maybe, because Pandya’s 21 st death anniversary is approaching (26 March). Have you forgotten Haren Pandya? He was the Home Minister of Gujarat before Narendra Modi assumed dictatorial powers in that state. Modi chose to teach humility to Pandya by making him the Minister of State for revenue. Pandya chose not to learn humility from Modi and resigned from that post in Aug 2002. Remember Gujarat of 2002? You should. A fire engulfed a train on 27 Feb 2002 killing 58 Hindu pilgrims who were returning from Ayodhya where they had gone to discover their god, not very unlike Christopher Columbus undertaking a voyage to discover India and messing it all up. What caused the fire in the train? Lord Ram knows probably. The upshot was that there was a riot in Gujarat by Hindus against Muslims. Haren Pandya is one of the BJP leaders who gave statements in many places indicting Modi for the riots. He asser