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She hopes, I exist

 


Diya Geomin is a grade 12 student of Carmel Public School, Vazhakulam, Kerala, India. She wrote the following poem about a close friend of hers who is struggling with depression. Notice how the problems of the other person intertwine with those of the poet persona.

 

She hopes, I exist

By Diya Geomin

 

She hopes to see the better world

She hopes to know her true self

That nobody, even herself, knows 

She hopes to find a new fantasy 

To escape some time alone.

 

She hopes to hide under the stairs

To cry out her pain somewhere no one cares 

She hopes to escape into her books.

With the pennies she doesn't have.

 

She hopes to run away to an unknown place.

Full of surprises, waiting to be startled.

Waiting to be claimed, owned and used

Be with every lover her books could offer.

 

Yet to her dismay, she finds none.

It's only herself, all alone

Hoping for some twisted ways to escape

Hanging by a thread waiting to be dropped.

 

Just like me, she dreams

Dreams left unfulfilled 

Only to haunt her soul forever 

 

Oh, how ironic that you hope,

Unlike me, who let the shadows consume my mind.

You hope and hope until there is nothing left 

You believe in destiny, not yet proven.

You go with the flow and be exhausted.

 

Unlike me who's covered in the black ink

Hope is dangerous, it kills you from within.

Until all there is left are our tears

The tears of betrayal.

 

So, my love, I'm helpless like that

Waiting to be devoured by the darkness within.

So, while you do, please hope for me too. 


 xZx

Comments

  1. AnonymousMay 21, 2024 at 7:38 AM

    Wow

    ReplyDelete
  2. Priyabrata NandaMay 21, 2024 at 8:08 AM

    Some of the readers of her poetry would in actuality find this poem to be their own saga, experiencing excruciating pain and hopelessness. For others, it could be self- discovery with eluding solutions.
    Overall, an excellent poem from an young sojourner.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LeylahMay 21, 2024 at 5:46 PM

      Thank you so much. It is indeed a perspective of a person who hoped too much but got nothing in return. But they still continue to encourage others to hope even though they got nothing from it.

      Delete
  3. parwatisingariMay 21, 2024 at 10:45 AM

    Very intense. Maybe she should speak to me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LeylahMay 21, 2024 at 5:42 PM

      Thank you so much for your appreciative words.

      Delete
  4. Lakshmi ShajiMay 21, 2024 at 8:17 PM

    Powerful words...

    ReplyDelete
  5. DawnanddewMay 21, 2024 at 8:37 PM

    Beautifully crafted words! It's difficult to find such friends today. The lines are deeply melancholic and reassuring.

    ReplyDelete
  6. VinayMay 21, 2024 at 9:45 PM

    I love the last line - I'm helpless like that, Waiting to be devoured by the darkness within - it has as deep sense of sadness to it, a sense of reality about hopelessness and wonder. Very moving..

    ReplyDelete
  7. Liz A.May 21, 2024 at 10:04 PM

    Moving poem.

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousMay 22, 2024 at 10:23 AM

    This poem reminds me of a thought that was written on the bulletin board of our classroom in Sawan. It said- " Never lose hope. Hope is a rope that swings you through life". Being from a Gurjar ethnicity, it was not easy to have a warm rapport with my teachers. So once my mathematics teacher read that thought and told me very sarcastically-"Beta! Tum bhi HOPE karte rahna, ek din zaroor maths mein pass ho jaoge".And guess what? I failed over and over again😊. Somethings never change, you see. Nostalgia strikes!

    Yours Last bencher:)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalMay 22, 2024 at 11:27 AM

      A lot of things could be different if we talked personally with people concerned. For example, if you had developed some sort of a rapport with that teacher, the entire situation would have been a lot different.

      Yet, I'm happy you're able to smile over these things now. All the best. I wish I could talk to you personally.

      Delete
    2. LeylahMay 22, 2024 at 4:40 PM

      This poem is about two people who are similar in character except for their perspective of hope. One of them is very hopeful while the other hoped too much and got nothing in return even though she encourage the other two hope. Because, could it be just her or is everyone unlucky in life?...

      Delete
    3. Tomichan MatheikalMay 22, 2024 at 6:07 PM

      If you start establishing contacts with people, you'll realise how sad most lives are!

      Delete
  9. Pradeep NairMay 22, 2024 at 12:00 PM

    Melancholic and intense.

    ReplyDelete
  10. marietta pereiraMay 22, 2024 at 6:31 PM

    The poem tugs at your heart strings.

    ReplyDelete

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