Skip to main content

Death and Dignity



The last of my maternal uncles breathed his last yesterday. A cousin of mine has been tethered to a ventilator today after a fall. The uncle was 93. The cousin must be around 80.

I am 64. I have lived twice as long as an average Indian of 1947. When India wrested independence from the British, the average life expectancy of an Indian was 32. Today the average life expectancy in India is 70 years, according to Macrotrends. My uncle, who was a teacher by profession, defied the national statistics. My cousin, who is a nun, is being assisted by one of the innumerable multi-speciality hospitals in Kerala to keep going and defy the national statistics.

Would she want to keep going? My inextricable perversion raises that question merely because I have always had a soft corner for her. She is a tender person. Someone who believes that love is the only purpose of human existence. She wouldn’t do anything that would give even the littlest trouble to others. I felt sorry for her when I was informed that she was sent to the ventilator. Would she want that? I have serious doubts.

I don’t ever want to be plugged on to a ventilator in any event. Haven’t I lived long enough?

There must be dignity in death just as much as in life.

I don’t want to lie in a hospital bed looking like a corpse that will be gawked at by friends and relatives.

Have you seen the last moments of bedridden people? If you have, you wouldn’t want to lie like that at all. One final dignified fall is what you would want.

I have written many times defending euthanasia precisely for this reason: dignity in death.

Since we are at it, let me also state my wish on what should be done after my death. I want my body to be cremated in an electric crematorium without any religious ritual. Let there be serenity too in death in addition to dignity. 

Comments

  1. Make sure your next of kin knows your wishes. My great-grandmother stated her wish not to be put on a ventilator. When she had her final attack, she called paramedics, and they put her on a ventilator (as she had called for assistance). She was shortly thereafter taken off of it (as my mother knew her wishes), and she passed. She was in her 80s.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. As of now, my wife knows. But I may have to think of someone more.

      Delete
    2. know about reincarnation read my blog
      https://felixanoopthekkekara.blogspot.com/2024/08/the-reincarnation-of-cameron-macaulay-i.html

      Delete
  2. Hari OM
    🙏 I recently made similar requests of my sister. YAM xx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Good to know there are others who think this way.

      Delete
    2. Interested in knowing about what happens after death read my blog to find out and feel free to express your views
      https://felixanoopthekkekara.blogspot.com/2024/08/the-reincarnation-of-cameron-macaulay-i.html

      Delete
  3. How nice would it be if we don't fear death and we know when we would die.
    we can complete all the things we need to do before our death.
    sir, when free please visit my blog too. I have posted a new one
    https://felixanoopthekkekara.blogspot.com/2024/08/the-reincarnation-of-cameron-macaulay-i.html

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did visit your blog and will do in future too. It's good to read what a student writes.

      Delete
  4. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could control the time of our departure from the world like we have managed to control births (at least to some extent)? I understand your wish and I agree being on the ventilator shouldn't be an option. I'd never ever want my children to face the dilemma of if/when they should let me go. To be honest, my greater fear is to live a half-life like that or a life of dependence rather than that of dying.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Living a half or more dead life is worse than hell!

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Ayodhya: Kingdom of Sorrows

T he Sarayu carried more tears than water. Ayodhya was a sad kingdom. Dasaratha was a good king. He upheld dharma – justice and morality – as best as he could. The citizens were apparently happy. Then, one day, it all changed. One person is enough to change the destiny of a whole kingdom. Who was that one person? Some say it was Kaikeyi, one of the three official wives of Dasaratha. Some others say it was Manthara, Kaikeyi’s chief maid. Manthara was a hunchback. She was the caretaker of Kaikeyi right from the latter’s childhood; foster mother, so to say, because Kaikeyi had no mother. The absence of maternal influence can distort a girl child’s personality. With a foster mother like Manthara, the distortion can be really bad. Manthara was cunning, selfish, and morally ambiguous. A severe physical deformity can make one worse than all that. Manthara was as devious and manipulative as a woman could be in a men’s world. Add to that all the jealousy and ambition that insecure peo...

Abdullah’s Religion

O Abdulla Renowned Malayalam movie actor Mohanlal recently offered special prayers for Mammootty, another equally renowned actor of Kerala. The ritual was performed at Sabarimala temple, one of the supreme Hindu pilgrimage centres in Kerala. No one in Kerala found anything wrong in Mohanlal, a Hindu, praying for Mammootty, a Muslim, to a Hindu deity. Malayalis were concerned about Mammootty’s wellbeing and were relieved to know that the actor wasn’t suffering from anything as serious as it appeared. Except O Abdulla. Who is this Abdulla? I had never heard of him until he created an unsavoury controversy about a Hindu praying for a Muslim. This man’s Facebook profile describes him as: “Former Professor Islahiaya, Media Critic, Ex-Interpreter of Indian Ambassador, Founder Member MADHYAMAM.” He has 108K followers on FB. As I was reading Malayalam weekly this morning, I came to know that this Abdulla is a former member of Jamaat-e-Islami Hind Kerala , a fundamentalist organisation. ...

Lucifer and some reflections

Let me start with a disclaimer: this is not a review of the Malayalam movie, Lucifer . These are some thoughts that came to my mind as I watched the movie today. However, just to give an idea about the movie: it’s a good entertainer with an engaging plot, Bollywood style settings, superman type violence in which the hero decimates the villains with pomp and show, and a spicy dance that is neatly tucked into the terribly orgasmic climax of the plot. The theme is highly relevant and that is what engaged me more. The role of certain mafia gangs in political governance is a theme that deserves to be examined in a good movie. In the movie, the mafia-politician nexus is busted and, like in our great myths, virtue triumphs over vice. Such a triumph is an artistic requirement. Real life, however, follows the principle of entropy: chaos flourishes with vengeance. Lucifer is the real winner in real life. The title of the movie as well as a final dialogue from the eponymous hero sugg...

Empuraan and Ramayana

Maggie and I will be watching the Malayalam movie Empuraan tomorrow. The tickets are booked. The movie has created a lot of controversy in Kerala and the director has decided to impose no less than 17 censors on it himself. I want to watch it before the jingoistic scissors find its way to the movie. It is surprising that the people of Kerala took such exception to this movie when the same people had no problem with the utterly malicious and mendacious movie The Kerala Story (2023). [My post on that movie, which I didn’t watch, is here .] Empuraan is based partly on the Gujarat riots of 2002. The riots were real and the BJP’s role in it (Mr Modi’s, in fact) is well-known. So, Empuraan isn’t giving the audience any falsehood as The Kerala Story did. Moreover, The Kerala Story maligned the people of Kerala while Empuraan is about something that happened in the faraway Gujarat quite long ago. Why are the people of Kerala then upset with Empuraan ? Because it tells the truth, M...

Empuraan – Review

Revenge is an ancient theme in human narratives. Give a moral rationale for the revenge and make the antagonist look monstrously evil, then you have the material for a good work of art. Add to that some spices from contemporary politics and the recipe is quite right for a hit movie. This is what you get in the Malayalam movie, Empuraan , which is running full houses now despite the trenchant opposition to it from the emergent Hindutva forces in the state. First of all, I fail to understand why so much brouhaha was hollered by the Hindutvans [let me coin that word for sheer convenience] who managed to get some 3 minutes censored from the 3-hour movie. The movie doesn’t make any explicit mention of any of the existing Hindutva political parties or other organisations. On the other hand, Allahu Akbar is shouted menacingly by Islamic terrorists, albeit towards the end. True, the movie begins with an implicit reference to what happened in Gujarat in 2002 after the Godhra train burnin...