The Impact of Your Deed

Illustration by Copilot Designer

Thirteen-year-old Briony makes a terrible mistake. She falsely accuses Robbie of raping Lola. Robbie is arrested. Cecilia is heartbroken. Briony herself regrets her act, but too late. All the painful harms have already been done. Atonement can be meaningless sometimes.

Briony, Robbie, Cecilia, all belong to Ian McEwan’s novel Atonement (2001). Why did Briony make a false charge against Robbie? First of all, there was a serious misunderstanding. Briony presumed that Robbie’s romantic interest in Cecilia, Briony’s elder sister, was lust with a mask. Secondly, Briony was probably jealous of the relationship between her sister and Robbie. As a little child, Briony had jumped into a river merely to be saved by Robbie. When asked why she did such a dangerous thing, her answer was, “Because I love you.”

Robbie is accused of raping Lola, Briony’s cousin. It was Paul Marshall who actually violated Lola, not once but twice. Briony did not see the man who ran away from Viola, but convinced herself that it was Robbie. Lola does not speak the truth either. [Later she marries Paul.] Robbie suffered all his life because of that one accusation and his subsequent arrest. Cecilia’s love for him deepens because she knows the rape-charge is false. She abandons her family and a promising career, and becomes a nurse in the army. Eventually she is killed in a bomb raid.

Briony too becomes a nurse in order to atone for her wrongs by doing a penance (nursing). Years later, as an old woman, Briony writes the story of Robbie and Cecilia telling the truth and expressing her grief. But what use is that? All the lives involved have already been wrecked.

I reread the novel in the last few days as I was waiting for Amazon to deliver my order for new books. Now, before I start reading the new arrival, I am What I am by Sunitha Krishnan, I wish to write about the butterfly effect of human actions with the example of Briony whose one single misjudgement set off a chain of irreversible consequences. Even small actions – a word, a choice, a silence – can ripple through other’s people’s lives in ways we may never anticipate. I’m sure you have experienced it sometime or at least witnessed in other people’s lives. I have. I have also been a perpetrator of such errors, unwittingly though.

Briony didn’t act out of malice either. Her understanding of people and events was limited. The simple truth is that our limited perspectives, biases, assumptions can misguide us. It is very important to pause before passing judgment or acting impulsively. I have learnt – rather late in life, unfortunately – that if we understand people and events we won’t judge, instead we may be tolerant, if not compassionate.

One of my favourite quotes is from Francois Mauriac. “It is God’s omniscience that helps Him to endure the sorrows of the world” [In the short story, A Man of Letters].  The more clearly we see the event, the less likely are we to become judges.

Equally important, we will be cautious with our words and deeds that can possibly ruin entire lives.