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Intimacy



Intimacy is rooted in understanding. It is impossible to live without at least one intimate relationship. As John Powell says in The Secret of Staying in Love, “No one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being.” Intimacy is that mirror.

Understanding each other leads to the discovery of each other’s inner beauty. It heals the wounds that inevitably mar that beauty occasionally. It can remove scars too. Intimacy has the tenderness of a soothing balm. Intimacy is a melodious poem that keeps on composing itself endlessly. Its rhythm is like the flow of a mountain brook; there are occasional stumbles and rumbles too.  

“Is physical intimacy the only thing which matters in a relationship? Can you live without it and yet be happy?” Blogger Anushree Aggarwal raised the question. Why can’t one live without physical intimacy and yet be happy? There are plenty of people who do that; priests and nuns, for example. Real intimacy may have nothing to do with physicality.



If we consider ordinary relationships, physicality is not an issue at all. I have a few intimate friends with none of whom I have any physical relationship and won’t ever have.

The physical aspect is not a part of intimacy, in fact. That is a mere biological need which has certain emotional trappings. My hunch [since I have no experience in this matter] is that physical intimacy is undesirable in healthy friendships except with one person. Yes, that fidelity is crucial when it comes to physicality. Otherwise, relationships are likely to be shallow affairs. Moreover, does sex play any role in friendly relationships?

Real intimacy is a sacred experience, as John O’Donohue says. Intimacy belongs to the soul, not to the body.


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Comments

  1. Jyotirmoy SarkarAugust 25, 2018 at 7:08 PM

    Beautiful writ up, good to go through the quotes and the view points(Logic) you have shared.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Nima DasAugust 27, 2018 at 11:15 AM

    Agree with you fully. Intimacy gives you insights into your soul but also to sustain a relationship itimacy is not the only factor.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Tomichan MatheikalAugust 27, 2018 at 11:38 AM

      Only a few relationships can be intimate for any individual. Among them physical intimacy should be a guarded affair, limited by marital or similar fidelity. That's my view.

      Delete
  3. Arvind PasseyAugust 29, 2018 at 3:52 PM

    Yes, I agree that real intimacy is a sacred experience... but then we have maverick hormones doing the unexpected all the time. The mind too remains helpless when hormones decide to strike. Do read about the link-up of intimacy with hormones in my post.

    Arvind Passey
    www.passey.info

    ReplyDelete
  4. Datta GhoshAugust 29, 2018 at 5:18 PM

    I kept nodding throughout the post. I agree, companionship transcends the boundaries of physical intimacy. And again, the definition pf physical intimacy varies from person to person. Over all there is something sacred in relationships that really matter.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnuSeptember 11, 2018 at 12:57 PM

    i believe sometimes the intimacy with your special someone does need the physical touch!
    agree with you, that discovering inner beauty is a beautiful journey by itself.

    thank u for writing such a nice post for my idea:)

    ReplyDelete
  6. sumita sofatApril 29, 2019 at 10:40 AM

    Nice Blog! Thanks for sharing information .Sofat infertility & women care centre provides the best fertility treatment at a reasonable price. Dr Sumita Sofat is the best gynecologist and Infertility specialist. Sofat Infertility Clinic is the best IVF centre Ludhiana.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Kanishka GuptaNovember 27, 2020 at 2:46 PM

    Types of intimacy depend the type of your relationship.

    ReplyDelete

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